ayannadb:

stripesdontmakeyoustraight:

stripesdontmakeyoustraight:

If you ever think you did something embarrassing just remember that I had a really hot waiter one time and i was gonna order double pepperoni pizza but I looked him dead in the eye and accidentally asked for double penetration pizza in front of my whole family

Stop reblogging my failure

NEVER. XDDD

This is too amazing.

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carry-on-my-consulting-tardis:

I have two moods 

One is highly sophisticated intellectual who goes into complex thoughts and is always moody and deep

the other is an immature 5 year old that doesn’t know how to control herself or her language or her actions

there is no inbetween

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  • 1 month ago
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kanrose:

iammakingperfectsense:

insidemymmind:

Okay, so in Science class yesterday we were talking about sleep cycles and melatonin and my science teacher said, “if you’re trying to sleep, avoid one colour. Blue. Your melatonin levels decrease when looking at the colour blue because it’s the colour of the sky.” GUYS, I KNOW WHY NONE OF US SLEEP. TUMBLR IS BLUE.

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THE JIG IS UP, YOU SNEAKY BASTARDS. WE’RE ONTO YOU.

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  • Guy in my class on the topic of the school trip:Wait. There's only two beds per room? Whoa. No way. I am not sleeping with one of you. I'm not, like, gay or something. Cant we just pay for another room? Like, I'm not gay.
  • His friend:Dude just because we're sharing a bed doesn't mean you're gonna be waking up to a fresh cup of my dick up your ass
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  • 1 month ago
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0trevskies:

rotg-art:

"Of course there aren’t any gay characters in animated movies! THEY’RE FOR KIDS!"

Yeah! Kids’ movies are supposed to be innoc-

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Because telling kids that they can love whoever they want is TOO TERRIFYING AND CONFUSING. But showing them murder, execution, death, frightening images, war, and bullying is just fine.

Not to mention 101 Dalmatians where a crazy woman wanted to SKIN 99 PUPPIES

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  • 1 month ago
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this-is-my-headspace:

Goblet of Fire: CEDRIC DIGGORY

Harry Potter: This is awesome 

Harry Potter: It’s gonna be such a fun year

Harry Potter: Hogwarts is definitely gonna win this thing

Goblet of Fire: HARRY POTTER

Harry Potter:

Harry Potter:

Harry Potter: I came out to have a good time -

Dumbledore: HARRY DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIRE

Harry Potter: I’m honestly feeling sO ATTACKED RIGHT NOW AND NO I DID NOT

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